Country Driver Gifts

"Head down this road 'bout three miles, turn right onto Route 12A, take that until you see a barn with a 'Trump' sign on it. At the foreclosure sign, make a left..."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

'So much for your new Satnav!'

Amusement Park Fun (Country Style).

Doug fights back at soaring gas prices.

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

"It's an honest mistake I'm sure we'll never hear of again."

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

Farmer and FIsherman

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

Better times ahead.

"No officer, I didn't what the speed limit was. Those signs were going by too fast."

YONDER...next 347 miles.

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

Just drive in small circles, then drop me off by that bush. Poober.

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

Exit Next Left

'I'm studying the lay of the land..'

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

'God's speed.'

"I'm pretty sure my self-driving car is moonlighting for Uber behind my back."

"Remember, when you back up, make that 'beep beep' sound."