Coulrophobic Chuckler T-Shirts

"I don't know what it is, but there's something about them that really gives me the creeps."

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil clowns is that good clowns do nothing."

Jesus Christ

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."

"Gesundheit!"

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

'I make certain all my clients are pessimists...they don't expect to win.'

Kisses--Sniff Your A-hole.

Various Birds of Pray.

"My Dad has just come out of hospital."

"You've got to admit, he wears the 'that dog won't hunt' label with a lot of class!"

'Everyone's a stand-up comic these days.'

'Gesundheit.'

"Sorry, Jeff. Two's company, three's an infestation."

'Does the suicide clause apply if he eats himself to death?'

"Is he still there?"

"Constipated, what a *#*##**# joke!!"

"They never would have got away with that in the Old Testament."

'Let's put it this way, part of you was offside!'

"I've found it the easiest way to administer nose drops!"

'Alimony is like having to pay instalments on a car after you have written it off!'

'Fortunately, the virus is dormant. Just be careful you don't wake it up.'

"One man's meat is another man's beloved pet."

"My wife took up walkin' a mile a day five years ago. Haven't seen her since!" "Lucky son of a..."

'Hey - I was in line first! There you go again...messing up the pecking order!'

'Your future husband will golf 7 days a week, 9 months out of the year. Since this is bad news, I won't charge you.'

'More specifically I have a fear of clowns that own fast food franchises.'

"Sometimes I just want a nice salad."