Cosmic Reader T-Shirts

Library Space Travel Section,"There you are sir,one small step for man."

God uses the universe as a reading light.

"I told you it was a book you couldn't put down."

Take two aspirin, and quit reading your horoscope.

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

Chicken soup for the sole.

Where cartoon characters go on holiday...

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"If the universe is expanding, that's all the more reason to get back to the city."

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

dog reading EKG

'Harnessing the Black Hole.'

"If the universe is expanding by 3 trillion cubic light years per second, why can't I find an apartment?"

Oh, we don't invade planets anymore --- Now we just hack into databases.

Astrology meets computer science. You think all computers are gemine? Yeah, they're born under a binary system.

Of course I believe your 'Alien Abduction' story...

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

'I think that's always how it's been!'

The fifth generation computer thinking it over- 'Now that there gone I'll get to work on the sixth generation.'

'Do you ever wish the Big Bang would have been just a little bigger?'

'That book is not available in this solar system, but we can order it for you.'

'There it is. Just above Orion's Pants.'

Bug to bug: 'Do you think there is life on other plants?'

'Recalculating!'

"... Now, turn left and go in a straight line for 60 trillion miles."

Entropy Seminar.

'It's THEM.'