Cosmic Gossip Enthusiast Gifts

"God, the sun is driving me crazy."

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

"Trying to impress us on your first day is understandable, but the moon has already been discovered."

"And the Hungriest Black Hole there ever was ate everything in the entire universe and lived happily ever after."

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

"It could never work between us."

Moon and Star

Astronaut

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

First Contact

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'

God Plays Baseball with the Earth

"With the whole world in NATO, we won't have to take any more crap from Mars."

"Thank you earthlings, without your space junk we would be nothing."

Astronaut Selfie.

'Do you have to yell 'far out!' every time you see something new?'

'It was definitely a bang. You heard it, I heard it, end of discussion.'

"Oh boy, what a treat! Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we get a full view of the Supermoon."

"Stocks closed higher on news the U.S. budget deficit and the universe are expanding, so go with the flow."

"All I get is a bird's eye view."

Les Bons Bourgeois - Looking in vain for the planet Leverrier

'Science versus religion?'

'There it is. Just above Orion's Pants.'

'I've had a toothache for the last million light years, take me to your dentist.'

"Be realistic, how can lumps of rock zooming around in space affect our lives down here?"

"What am I, chopped liver?"

Space Shuttle.

"I don't know—maybe we could look at something besides Canis Major tonight?"

Spaceman with a vacuum cleaner in space

"Remember, there's an additional charge if you don't refill the tank before you return it."

As space walking astronaut vacuums dust particles: 'Houston, we see to have the cosmic dust problem under control.'

'I'm NOT sweating -- those are OCEANS!'

"Whoa...Somehow I think I deleted too much."

"...but that equals 243 Earth days!"