Cosmic Contemplators Gifts

"...But here in the outside world, I need more time and I need more space."

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

"Of course, in cosmic years, we're still quite young."

"Shall we put it in play?"

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

'I'm sorry but I need my own space.'

'I just can't keep up with the conversations in deep space.'

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

'What I especially like about being a philosopher-scientist is that I don't have to get my hands dirty.'

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

Buffering

"While Covid is still our top story scientists remain focused on Earth's pending collision with Jupiter."

"Only an astronomer would describe a star that's 30 trillion miles away as 'right next door'."

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

'You don't want to go to hell, J.B. In hell, the market is always down.'

'Bravo Professor, you stumbled upon the one fact that makes sense of it all. Unfortunately humanity is not permitted to know that the Universe was designed by a committee of ducks.'

This plaque commemorates the trees that was cut down to make space for this bench.

"My job is not as easy as it looks: You have to learn about astronomy and celestial mechanics to be able to accurately predict sunrise and sunset..."

'I understand the Adirondacks are where it's REALLY happening.'

"Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise."

Apocalipsis

"Nope! Not that one! They still believe that 'gods' created the universe!"

"This human experiment has gone on long enough. Give the hippos control."

"I'm sorry to trouble you yet again with internet issues."

"Totality was great, but now that it's over I'm like, 'What am I even doing?'"

God's Writers Block

Pentagon Science Contest: 'I think the post office lost my invitation from the pentagon for their 'star trek' contest.'

How come Mercury gets the car pool lane? He's alone and we've got all these moons!

'Hey, don't look at me -- I was AGAINST free will.'

'I think I just blew my diet. Do you know what the glycemic index is for a communion host?'

If fifty is the new seventy, when is the new dead?

"Pay no attention. It's his way of telling us he needs a lot of space."

"And what about us?"