Cosmetic Surgery Explorer T-Shirts

"As a kid I was told, 'Act your age.' As an adult I'm told, 'Don't look your age.'"

"And this is what we use for the economy liposuction."

"In your case we’ll begin the facelift with an incision behind your right ear and extend it into the waiting room."

The good, the bad and the ugly.

"I just got back from my plastic surgery consultation. The surgeon is also a football coach in his free time."

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

Meanwhile in Hollywood

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

A new you. 'First, you've got to stop lying about you age.' It didn't start off well.

"No, Doris, not implants!"

PROBLEM AREAS

Do you think I'm sixty?

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"Mirror, mirror on the wall ... what the heck is up with my hair?"

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

Become a Cosmetic Surgeon - Raise a Few Eyebrows!

'I know you'll find this hard to believe but I am actually a self made man.'

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

'Here's the name of my cosmetic brain surgeon. He make you look smarter.'

'During the heart-transplant, since it was your birthday, I went ahead and added two more inches, no charge.'

'You do Botox?'

'Botox...'

Mirror mirror...

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

Body Building

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

'You know what'll do wonders for you? A nose job.'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."