Cosmetic Procedure Fan Gifts

"What are you going in there for?... Can't you just soak them in a glass of bleach?"

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

'It's a chinstache. They were popular in the 1800's, but now they're coming back.'

Hairstyles

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

Chuck played mean hair guitar.

Surgery Instructions.

"You must be new around here, pardner."

2050 A. D: Cloning is quite common place.

'I've got a good idea! Let's take everything out and start from scratch.'

His movember moustache made him feel very distinguished.

181 yeard old, huh? This is the worst fake I.D. I've ever seen. And that beard! Ha! Nice try, Mr.... Uhh... 'Van Winkle.'

'Having limited funds, Irwin goes with the less expensive chest hair transplant.'

"I'm not helping you out of the TAR PIT!! I might break a nail!!"

"I warned you that collagen lip injections were not without risk, Mrs. Rawlinson."

Door-to-Door Liposuction.

Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

"You've got some beard in your food."

A man with a unibrow sneezes and the unibrow becomes his moustache.

'Yes, this is a bad time. I'm operating on a patient 4,500 miles away.'

"You end up with the face you can afford."

"But enough about my teeth. Let's talk about your teeth."

'Sometimes I sort of miss pre-hair-restorer-Timothy...'

"Ideally, I'd like a reboot to 'factory settings'."

'Okay then, Irene, I won't mention your face-lift and you don't say anything about my implants!'

'Jungle hair.'

"Here's his medical directive."

sleeping teeth

Budget Toupees.

'Oh, one of those tough guys with a mustache, eh?'

'Do you mind if I grow a beard?' 'Okay. As long as you don't wear it in the house.'

Comedy, Tragedy, Beardy