Cosmetic Adventurer Gifts

"He insisted on buttock implants for his birthday."

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

I Finally Got Implants!

Whar do you think. Dear? Is the BOTOX working? 'Oh, no! Why doesn't she just ask me if her butt is too big!'

'Just where did you get this facelift?'

Haircuts

"This is daring, but I like it."

Busy man, busy life, busy shirt.

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

"Underweird bras."

Congratulations on the new you!

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

Comedy Ballet of Marionettes I (Oil Version in Tate Known as 'A Caprice'

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"We have a very special relationship with our barber."

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"It makes a statement, but it begs a question."

The Inventor of the Man Bun!

"A conundrum, rather than an outright mess, I think, Mrs Ellis..."

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

'My hair is so bad I have to cut it myself. I tried going to a hair salon once - they just yelled at it.'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'I AM a cowboy so therefore they ARE cowboy boots, OK?'

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'

"She won't be long, I'm just putting her face on."

"We hired all the designers ourselves."

"At least you have taste when it comes to your computer's wallpaper."

Columbus discovers ... his feminine side.

'Bradley is a strict vegetarian. Do you have broccoli flavored lipstick?'