Corporate News Gifts

Tax inspector for ordinary people vs. Tax inspector for multinationals.

'That's our mission statement.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

Welcome to the Team

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

Thanks to the financial business scientists know it for sure now - Black Holes really exist!

Parade of Businessmen

'Before we starnt, has everyone shed their moral baggage?'

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

XYZ Inc, putting a folksy, human face on unfettered corporate greed for over 50 years.

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

"You're on top of this week's Sales Pyramid."

'The recession is over, again.'

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

'Our company has hit an iceberg and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

"You know, there's a corporate elevator."

Men on escalators reading newspapers, shares are going up on the up escalator and down on the down escalator.

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

"On Wall Street today, news of lower interest rates sent the stock market up, but then the expectation that these rates would be inflationary sent the market down, until the realization that lower rates might stimulate the sluggish economy pushed the mark

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."

'As my subordinate, naturally I expect you to take the heat on things that otherwise would make me uncomfortable.'

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'