Corporate Funster Pillows

"The water for your fishbowl was approved, but it looks like for now you're not getting the fish."

'My new year's resolution was to delegate more...So I delegated managing massively increased demands with drastically reduced resources in a flat-lining economy to George.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

British savings accounts

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'You're close, Spencer, but usually a business plan is a little more involved!'

'Recent studies in primate colonies suggest that organizational performance can be improved by replacing complicated financial incentives with bananas.'

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

What happens when the bears are running the market.

'In order to fund your deferred compensation, we won't be paying you any salary.'

'Don't worry about a few pounds up or down. Our main concern is always your bottom line.'

"Are you ready to engage with rock-rased content?"

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

The Horse Jump - One girl makes it over, the other is cover in leaves.

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

'It takes great courage of conviction to know you're wrong, yet still proceed forward.'

'Oh, wait. There's a note. It says; Fill her up with euros.'

'I love it when you say - 'I'm going to print money'.'

Pirates

'Well, Eddy may look a bit rough, but he's good at heart - last week, he bought stocks from a company which produces cuddly puppy toys in pink ballet dresses!'

"Dad, the dean has gone over your financial statement, and he doesn't think you're working up to your full potential."

'Looks like your recovery has been slowed by a diet rich in Greece, followed by a bout of gas problems. Continue to take your QE and call me next quarter.'

10 Days Without an Interest Rate Change

'Stocks fell on the news that whatever can go wrong, usually does go wrong.'

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

"Goodbye cruel world."

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

Guess your net worth, only 25 cents.

Leopards do change their spots

"This place has a water view if you're looking at the mortgage."

'Don't panic, folks! It's red ink, not blood!

The TROU of the Baroque

Ten business commandments, city trading floor

'That's much better.'