Corporate Colleague Gifts

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"This position has become very important to the company."

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'That's our mission statement.'

James Bond in a Snow Globe

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

International Women's Day

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

'Look, you can only do so much!'

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

Colour Version: Living by the Clock