Corporate Catapult Gifts

The buck stops here. However, ultimately it gets passed on to activist stockholders who want to run the show.

"Relax, Smithers. I put my pants on one leg at a time like any other man. Except like now, of course, when I'm not wearing any."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Businesswoman Empowerment

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

A fight in the Boardroom.

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

How leaders fail

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

Can do...No can do

"I don't care if you are the Immediate Gratification Generation. Get out of my chair and back to the mailroom."

Storm in the out tray

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

Overworked in the office