Corporate Ladder Climber Gifts

'He's done well considering he was just a part-time summer intern.'

Organisational Structure

"Remember, you weren't hired to think-you were hired because you have opposable thumbs."

Who's In Charge Here?

'You've written a bold and innovative proposal. Unfortunately, it challenges the status quo and that can jeopardize my job.'

'You're probably all wondering who I've promoted to VP of sales!'

"It's always cozy in here. We're insulated by layers of bureaucracy."

"It's my new social distancing desk."

-"Wife and kids?" -"No, a photo of a set of beautifully prepared accounts."

"I have my pants put on one leg at a time."

"Rumour has it that you're after my job."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Farkas can't see you right now. Can you come back when you're more important?"

'People respect sincerity, Hopkins; learn to fake that and you'll have it made.'

'Henderson, I'm giving you an opportunity to shine.'

Leadership seminar

"Life is unfair, Devlin, and business is life in spades."

"Humility is a virtue, but not on a resume."

'I'd like a job where I'm hated for having obscene amounts of money.'

'Hot air not only rises - sometimes it rises to the top.'

'You remember Mr. Horton? You know, the one you said to give the 'clean desk' award to? -- you fired him three years ago.'

'Yes, I occasionally make mistakes but, unlike you, I never have to acknowledge them.'

'If you keep convincing people at work that you are irreplaceable, how can you ever be promoted?'

'My dear George, you failed as a salesman and got fired as the head of marketing, you've been a lousy accountant and a failure at human resources. Well, to make it short - welcome to the supervisory board!'

'So he eats the odd secretary now and then. He's our top actuary and I intend to make him a partner.'

Career Ladder - You Are Here

'To achieve anything you must start at the bottom and work upwards.'

'Lots of people encouraged me to go into business for myself. Come to think of it, they were all former employers.'

'Your good work leaves me in a splendid position. Isn't that enough reward for you?'

"Well you seem to have no discernible skills, have you considered management?"

Executive Elevator

"I don't like to pull rank, but I'm the one with two papers."

Income inequality vs Income Diversity.

"It's come to my attention that some of the salaried employees are asking where the Hamptons are. Under no circumstances are they to be told."

"O.K. guys, now lets go and earn that four hundred times our workers' salaries."

"Wow. I can't believe I got this far without anyone asking me for an I.D."