Cord Cutter Gifts

The kids watch too many stupid shows. I agree. So let's pull the plug! Which one?

Cord cutter

Learn Guitar In 6 Easy Lessons: Add another fifty difficult ones!

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

'Doesn't it feel good to be taking care of our planet?'

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

'You said you wanted a F-A-C-E chord.'

"If a tree falls in the forest and hits a certain individual, would he still be able to testify?"

'How much did you say we'd be saving by buying a wood-burning stove?'

The sounds of a tree falling in the forest.

The Lumberjack and the Yule Log

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

Loggerheads

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

Sawrd Fighting

'This cola only has half the calories, so if I only drink half that would be no calories!'

Man cutting a tree using a axe connected to a machine

'Yeah, well I'm sick of being so danged happy all the time.'

A lumberjack leans against a giant pencil that reads "Giant Sequoia Brand No .2".

Take your Daughter to Word Day

"Of course trees can walk. We're just lazy."

Man chops down trees to make wooden car.

Man talking to a tree.

'What did I tell you about feeding your pet beaver table scraps?'

Tree thinks about its lifecycle as a man is about to cut it down.

Paranoid Woodcutter Suspicious of Trees

'Due to concerns about Global Warming...I'm through with cooking.'

'Dad, I've got two more chargers for you to store.'

The world's last tree was felled...

Lumberjack Interviews

Eric Clapton.

"Maybe if we both pull."

"Wait! Wait! Wait! I can tell you exactly what it sounds like if I fall and nobody hears it!"

"Ooo - nice! What chord was that?"