Cool Parents Club Pillows

"If you're going to drink, we'd rather you do it in the house where we can party with you."

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"Mom, Mom, watch me!"

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

Newborn Chaos

I am to blame.

'Twiiiiiiiiins!!!!'

'Mom never pops a wheelie.'

Switchback Playground.

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

"Look what I found in the garage! My old music speakers!"

'Thanks for the offer to baby sit him, and don't worry, he's not a fussy eater: Any dung you can find will do...'

'Doreen's been all over me to paint the house...'

Congratulations!

'Either switch off his batteries or take 'em out!'

"Having a mom who works for the Pentagon has its perks."

'Her first telekinesis!'

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

Bookie by Merry-Go-Round.

Husband for Sale- Pregnancy Forces Sale

My child was student of the month...But that was a long time ago.

'Dad, make a noise like a dinosaur!'

New parents refusing to change their baby's nappy

"Another round of iced teas, and would you please find a placemat that will actually challenge our gifted son."

'My mother signed my report card, but it got smudged by her tears.'

'True happiness!'

"He did well in his exams. He got an A level in creative knitting."

"His first fax."

"We think it's important to meet the parents of our daughter's bad influences."

Right before baby's first text.

"Joey is very good at mental arithmetic: I call him little pocket calculator..."

"Your parents bring the presents, and he takes the credit."