Cool Hunters T-Shirts

"Well, I've come this close to asking out Sylvia Sanchez. But I'm just an average guy! Nothing about me says 'I'm cool! Look at me!'"

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

Easter Island Cheeseheads

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'

A Club Sandwitch.

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 4

"We succumbed to your hype."

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

"Why are we eating all this fattening stuff? Pier pressure."

'When they said a cruise with a 'balcony view' I didn't think they meant a view of the balcony.'

Computers affect real life.

Fisherman: 'HOLY MACKEREL!'

"Why is there an ad for Jay-Z in the New England Journal of Pediatric Medicine?!"

'You're going to need a bigger net.'

"Were you even listening to me? I don't have a mother to blame anything on!"

'-and I suppose you want chips with it?'

The first Airbender!

'Okay, I'll stand on the mantle, but she's never going to believe you bagged a duck.'

"These come with a Health and Safety warning..."

Tickets being sold for the Fun House and the Religious Fundamentalist House,

"It could never work, Richard. I'm going to be a gefilte fish, and you're not."

'If we had any guts we'd get out of here!'

'All this job requires is some mud-wallowing and snarling... I'd say you're overqualified.'

'I told you a blowgun was a bad idea!'

"Are you talking to me?"

"You kids are lucky. When I was young, we had to roll down the windows and stick our heads out to be cool."

"The only spells she does anymore are the Gospels."

'Well, Dewey, the world will never be the same. ... the deer have gone nuclear.'

"We're from the TV show, Gadget Hoarders. You're so bad, we're doing a two-hour special on you."

'...Now we'd be expecting turning water into a decent '67 vintage at the VERY LEAST!'

'No, I don't do much flying. I'm just here for the peanuts!'

'What can we do for you?' - 'I need a song removed from my mind.'