Cookout Connoisseur T-Shirts

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

Counting ribs

I could have danced all night!

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Party Animals.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

"I've just barbecued my head again."

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

"I love this time of day."

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

A man is in an office, behind him is a glass box containing a glass and a bottle, there is a sign saying 'in case of emergency'

Superheroes Having a Drink

"Another flue shot, Larry.

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

The Corner Of Ogden And Nash: Candy is Daddy/Liquor is Quicker

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

"This looks like a job for 'Margarita Man!'"

Taking a little mental vacation can help as long as you don't go to mental.

Sparks Fly When The Little Gray Suit Meets The Little Black Dress

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

Join me in a glass of champagne?

"May I take your plate or are you still nibbling?"

"Well, here he is. He just grew on me until I couldn't stand it anymore."

"Pavlov's dog: Friday night"

"I think I'll have the fish. No, wait... yes, the fish." "So many choices... what is a Reuben? Never mind, I'll have the fish, too." "I always get the same thing, but it's so good. Alright, I'll have the fish."

"I had a low birth weight but a high birthright."

'I'd steer clear of the rum punch.'

"You're going to regret this in the morning."