Cookie Prankster Pillows

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

"Ninja bread men"

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

"But I'm conducting an experiment: will the twentieth cookie taste as good as the first?"

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

"I said hot, boiling oil! Not cold, refreshing milk!"

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

Doughnut Criminals

'Thank you for the turkey, thank you for the dressing, and thank you for the squash, which Mother cleverly refers to as pumpkin pie.'

'Santa, don't believe him. He's the one who ate the cookies and milk last year.'

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

'Because it's there!'

Cookie Thief

It had been a good life, filled with passion and joy, tender bonds, and finally one irretrievable error.

'Okay, this is the scene where the bear becomes a parachute.'

"For God's sake, Michelangelo, it's just a cookie!"

'... we've got a crowd of, oh I'd say fourteen million organisms here for the annual 'Salmonella potato salad bowl'!'

MD to patient: 'So, it's a little fuzzy and you're seeing spots?'

Tiny restaurant portion. Man finds magnifying glass amongst cutlery.

"Student unicorn"

He's Tasty!