Conundrum Lovers T-Shirts

Information. If you can't put toothpaste back in the tube, how did it get there in the first place?

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

M16 Code-breakers office

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'

'If we had a bill of rights that got wronged, would it be right or wrong for a judge to right that wrong?'

'But how could me speaking at the Secret New Products Seminar break our Confidentiality Agreement?'

'Now close your eyes and visualize our upcoming softball game against the elm street zen center and kicking their sorry behinds.'

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

"My first novel is a prequel of a sequel, it's about time travel."

"Sales rep from Milton Keynes? You prove he no British spymaster who sent you on secret mission to Bananastan?"

What's your problem? I love my wife... And I hate my mistress.

'Wow! How did you catch something smaller than the bait you were using?'

'And you're quite sure it's just a hypothetical cat?'

"O.K. Where is he?"

'Know what? I don't feel drafts anymore.'

"Uh-oh this is going to be a tough one."

"Why did the farmer cross the road?"

If People Believed in Heaven and Hell

Arc Light: Wave Division and Particle Division.

Do you mean me personally? Or how much wood we could chuck on average?

"Have you tried our new Postman flavor?"

Semantics - A classroom in which meanings are discussed (Actually, this is just a door. The classroom is on the other side of the door.)

Woman tries to drink wine whilst wearing a face mask.

"I'm attracted to his 'come to bed eyes', but I'm put off by his 'go to the cake shop body'."

You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! I met a lady a while back. We're both stuck in marriages we don't want to be in. We'd rather be together but we don't have the courage to end things. What do you mean "courage"? Ending things isn't "courageous," it's cowardly. Courage means not running from misery, but embracing it, becoming its master, and delivering it upon all those around you with vengeance.

'Well you said you were hot, so should I turn the fan on or not?'

"I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism"

'Let's circle, just to freak him out.'

Two Devils Befriending an Angel.

I lost my wallet here. Could you check lost and found? Sure. What's it look like? Oh, it's leathery, canvas, nylon-ish … blue-black gray-purpley-greenish … it has a Visa-Mastercard-Amex-Discoverish cards and one-ten-fivey dollars in it. I keep an I.D. of a dear friend in it for sentimental reasons. Get out.