Contract Whiz Gifts

"You may read the small print Mr Hill, but you obviously didn't read the microscopic print!"

"I support you one hundred per cent in your battle against upfront fees..."

"He's agreed to sign for £75,000 a week - and do we need joined-up writing?"

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

How to deliver a successful presentation.

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'Upset at you for breaching the non-compete? Of course not.'

"You were right. Building an online business empire is even more fun than playing games."

'Maybe we should sign him before the MVP award is announced.'

"There are the arts, the sciences, agriculture, and commerce. Stick with commerce, if you know what's good for you."

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

'Keep asking for more allowance. It's good practice for negotiating future stock and option grants.'

'How fast can you hype?'

'Those are my twins: NASDAQ and Dow. They were born at the height of the dot.com boom.'

You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it.

A young boy sits behind a lemonade stand with a sign that reads "Lemonade 25¢ - Jay Antosh, Chief Executive Officer".

"I like your thinking Steve. Hiding the contract loopholes under the staples is brilliant."

"Once you get over the three hundred and sixty eight texts it took to plan this, it really is nice to get together."

The Communicator

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

'This is a very dysfunctional company. No one will talk aboaut about the elephant in the boardroom!'

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

Kid selling lemonade has a picture of the founder: himself

An overachieving headless chicken.

"Son, you're old enough now to learn about something we call 'compliance'...."

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

'I don't get it. He's got only one tongue and two ears, but he talks twice as much as he listens.'

'I cam for your obsolete operating system.'

Student about Biz Quick class: 'It's bite-size information in a 15 minute class that teaches you how to roll in the dough.'

"You can go home now, Barmpot - we've balanced."

"I can see you and I'm still too busy."

"This new budget plan to save us millions has cost us billions! How much to switch back?"