Considering Pet Ownership Pillows

Dog food 5p off - "No, it isn't a good reason to buy a dog!"

'I'm looking for a pet I can ignore.'

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"Pick me!"

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"Foster failure"

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

"It get it – you're hungry."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'I'm not sure which one is the role model.'

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

'Why can't my walks be that fun?'

Cling-On Dog

"Man's best friends."

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

"I throw this ball, you go get it and bring it back — everything else will fall into place."

'I really don't think mouth-to-mouth wroks on fish, Ben.'

A man and his dog

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

'He does lack social skills.'

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.