Future Pet Owner Pillows

"I told you a pet is a lot of responsibility. Now, take your balloon dog out for some air."

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Pick me!"

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

"Cat box"

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"Man's best friends."

'She's just great with the children.'

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

Girl wags her pony tail as dog wags his tail.

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

No littering...

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

A gardener sowing flower seeds - and a cat sowing bird seed.

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

"I've told you why I need a dog. Now suppose you tell me what makes you think you might be that dog."

Beware of the Dog Hair.

'Seriously. You have to get one of these.'

'Sure, it's our pool. . . but who's going to tell him that?'

'I think he thinks I'm a pillow.'

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

"Hey Scout, isn't ice fishing great?"

'I think he's lonely.'

Presidential Pooch Meets The Press

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

'How's my rabbit settling into his new home? He's still a bit jumpy!'