Conservationist Comedian T-Shirts

'I've started to collect them.... soon I'll have a complete 'Badger set'!'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

'It's an extinction notice.'

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Penguin

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

'But Honey, if we have kids, we won't be endangered anymore: We will lose all the social benefits and attention...'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

'...and this is the water garden...'

"Technically, He's supposed to generate more energy than he uses."

"I see you have extensive wood chuckery experience."

Where's my global warming?

"Feeling that only you can prevent forest fires could be construed as delusions of grandeur."

Ecotourism.

This is where Brent council sends you

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

Alligator Bars

"Have you noticed Carl never leaves the field to go to the bathroom?"

"This is a terrible table!"

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

'So there's global warming. What possible harm could it do?'

'I'd say that our transport policy couldn't get any greener'

"Rising sea levels."

'Did you just hear that? Scientist say we are now an endangered species and mating should be our top priority!'

Crossing Guard to rabbit at Deer Crossing: 'Not so fast, buddy - you don't look like a deer to me!'

"It doesn't make me feel sexy, it makes me cross-eyed!"

'A tortoise is coming toward us' 'I newt' 'I toad you' 'Great, I'm on Walden Pun.'