Conquistador Enthusiast T-Shirts

Hernan Cortes

Welcome to the Team

Homo Gamus

Gamers

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

'Larry, you have everything it takes to go far in this company, but a word of advice: lose the laugh.'

'How about that? -- Lady Godiva got a bouffant!'

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

A lot of attention gets paid to the Earl of Sandwich, and rightfully so, but let's not forget to show some respect for that neglected Lord of Lunch, the Viscount of Potato Salad.

Contest to enter the University

"Now, see here, I've been wronged! Some no-good do-nothing rat pack got me sick, and I gotta know who!"

'Wait a minute, this guy is missing a head Oh jeez, we're totally gonna crash,'

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.

William Tell's son wears hi-vis jacket and hard hat

"If there's anything we can do to make your stay more pleasant, just rant about it all over the Internet."

'There hasn't been an assassination attempt all week -- what are they up to out there?'

"I think the Greeks are running out of ideas."

"Ha ha, very funny. But seriously … there’s a pub at the top?"

Franz Liszt

''Have you got any cockroaches?"

"The classics can be so intimidating."

Cheap Secrets

"Look, if you can't stand the Byzantine intrigue, perhaps you should get out of the cabal."

'Tah-DAH! -- Guess what I conquered!'

Grand show of prize vegetarians.

"If you can keep a secret, I'll tell you how my husband died."

Genghis Khan

Man hunting a bear.

He's a true legend, but only the part about dubious veracity.

King of the Mountain

CIA, 'Nothing much going on right now -- want to dig up some dirt on the FBI?'

"The lab boys figured out how to change lead into gold. Now your job is to corner the lead market."

Napoleon Bonaparte