Connected Connoisseur T-Shirts

"This wasn't me, it was the bottle talking."

"We were unable to release his grip on the smart phone."

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"We evolved from asteroids"

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

"I think that was one upgrade to many for Chris!"

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

A Highly Networked Staff

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

"The big money doesn't seem to be in Pretzels anymore."

"I would never do a nude scene, unless the part really called for it."

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

"Thank you, gentlemen, and may the best networked man win."

Scientist drinking night sky through telescope

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Coming Soon! Taco Sphere

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

Note to viewers: we've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

"I'm so sorry, there is nothing I can do for him anymore...he must have been offline for at least 10 hours..."

'Who are you and what do you want?'

'Your baseball card has more value than you do.'

'Slow Connection'

'Honey, I fear, to be a European patriot means a little more than having a German beer for breakfast, Italian pizza and French wine for lunch and Spanish brandy for dinner...'

Old lady spying on the neighbours using a webcam.

"What kind of moviemaking do we want to reinforce?"

"Oh, I was looking for something with a little more hay."

The pilgrimage begins

'I can't identify with any brand emotionally!'

Napa, Bellevue, McLeon

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