Congressional Hearing Aficionado Pillows

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

'Hanson - committee of four.'

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

Older lady to husband surrounded by dogs: 'Still getting feedback from your hearing aid?'

06 Congressional Record.

"Not guilty by virtue of reasonable doubt."

'Your honor, we are appealing on grounds the post-trial book deals didn't match the pre-trial publicity.'

"I suppose the first thing to do is form an escape committee."

'Where's My Bail-out?' 'Where's Your Lobbyist?'

CONGRESS, 'You know, we wouldn't need a pay hike if we got commissions on our appropriations.'

'I've got it! - We'll call it the SUPERpatriot Act!'

"I get all my life-critical data from TV."

Looking for a way to have their cake and eat it too.

'Are you capable of distinguishing right from wrong?', 'Can you give me a hint?'

'Never put off what you can do today, there may be a law against it tomorrow.'

The Academic Brain, showing parts: teach, write, do research, and (the largest part) serve on committees.

A witness giving testimony in court

An identity thief takes the stand.

Disraeli entrusted with the task of forming a Conservative Ministry

"You lead such an interesting life. I've never been called to testify before a Congressional Banking Committee."

"The firm needs LEADERSHIP, does anyone have any ideas?"

The young Thomas Mulcair...

'It's got to be some kind of scam -- he has all his legislation copyrighted.'

Grand Theft Government

'The spirit of bipartisan cooperation is back - if you vote against my bill, I'll vote against your bill.'

'I forget. Is this a committee meeting, a sub-committee meeting, a steering committee...'

'If you loan me five bucks for lunch, I'll co-sponsor that $80 billion appropriation bill of yours.'

"You were filibustering in your sleep again."

These things are sent to try us.

Librarian of Congress