Concoction Creator T-Shirts

'Try my health brew...1% fat, no cholesterol, high fiber and low sodium.'

A Good Batch.

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

Congratulations on your retirement!

"I forget to drink."

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

'What? You used a Welshman? The recipe specifically calls for a scot!'

"I don't bake, I don't cook, but I make one kick-ass vinaigrette."

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

Unrest Area.

The Rind of the Ancient Mariner.

'Because we're still part of society - that's why we have to go organic.'

'Well, we turned water into wine. Anyone remember how?'

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'

My friend here is being FAR too modest! He's not just ANY bartender! Karl's the guy who invented the Fuzzy Navel!'

'It was a lot more congenial when we had happy hour.'

'When I first saw here I thought I'd died and gone to heaven, but not with beer at these prices!'

"Don't worry about the economy, dear. We'll always live large."

"You'd be amazed how just a little soybean meal adds to the protein content of powdered bats wing and next tails."

"...I suggest we call it Greenspanium"

Need Cash for Alcohol Research.

Remember how I came in on December 31st and ordered a lardo-size fudgsicle sugarbomb mocha with butter sprinkles? Well, give me another one of those. Since it's something I originally had last year, it'll be like I had this one last year too. So it won't violate my New Year's resolution. The ancient art of Time-Shift-Fu. I'm a tenth level grand master. I studied under Moe Yin, the master who created "it's not really 'cheating' if it's with an ex."

Liquor Store - Gift Suggestions.

'Love is a Drug'.

Caveman turning the wheel into a bar.

Mummy has set up a pulley system in his sarcophagus.

"Not moonshine - small batch, artisanal grain alcohol."

"I swear, you won't be able to tell the difference, plus, turkey eye of newt is much healthier for you."

Lighting a Pipe

"What a coincidence, I'm an influencer too!"

Hold The Pickles

I say when life hands you a lemon, make lemonade

"I decided to burn all my previous napkins and start fresh."