Crafty Concoction Creators T-Shirts

"Not moonshine - small batch, artisanal grain alcohol."

A Good Batch.

Toadstools

Tabletop Theatre

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

'What? You used a Welshman? The recipe specifically calls for a scot!'

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

"I don't bake, I don't cook, but I make one kick-ass vinaigrette."

Blog Breakdown

'Because we're still part of society - that's why we have to go organic.'

'Well, we turned water into wine. Anyone remember how?'

'When I first saw here I thought I'd died and gone to heaven, but not with beer at these prices!'

"You'd be amazed how just a little soybean meal adds to the protein content of powdered bats wing and next tails."

The Remote Olympics

Liquor Store - Gift Suggestions.

"...I suggest we call it Greenspanium"

'I think we've done it, Igor. This will be the hot new sports drink of the summer!'

Favorite Selections from 800,000 Things To Do With a Scarf

"This mixture of herbs and spices will rid the casa of ghosts! I will send them fleeing into the night!"

"What a coincidence, I'm an influencer too!"

"Any cocktail can be a shrimp cocktail if you just set your mind to it, and if you carry lots of loose shrimp in your pocket."

'Enough with the eye of newt. Do you know how many calories there are in newt eyes?'

"This one's a blend of historical and contemporary botanicals."

"It's one of those microbrews."

Ew, no! Kombucha is disgusting.

"It's a new craft beverage with zero carbs, zero calories, and no bitter aftertaste. It's called water."

"Are you ordering two more bottles or just slipping into your 'great icons of drinking' mode?"

'Ok Captain, let's see if we can get this crate down!'

'One unexpected problem I've run into, since making my own wine, is finding foods to pair with 160-proof Burgundy.'

"It's too late to call them now—they'll be sound asleep. They live in Connecticut!"

Cut out and keep your own Prince Charming.

'Since we switched from discovering new lifesaving antibiotics to discovering new daiquiri drinks, our funding has tripled.'

Zeke only drinks craft hootch from a micro-still nowadays.