Computer Whisperer Pillows

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

'My teacher and my computer were both down today.'

"I always get the feeling it's holding something back."

Sad looking computer with plasters and a black eye

Computer help.

'If I need emergency assistance with this program, do I type 911?'

STRIP Hambone: Bashing a computer to make it work

Struggling with unwilling computers.

"I have a real love/hate relationship with email."

"Is he from another planet...?"

"How's the computer analysis going?"

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'You said the computer was coming between us. So I put your name as my password.'

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

Fixing the Computer.

Phil would get giddy after a large print run, but the company was saving a fortune.

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

Man and Machine snoozing

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

"Can you spare a few megabytes of your precious time?"

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"I think we could work very well together."

"Can you help me? I'm having a little trouble working the shredder."

'Tell me more about your programmer.'

'Oh great, a machine with an attitude.'

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

Computer whisperer.

we wanted to get rid of all the 'superbugs' but they were the only one's who understood the new it system