Computer Techs Gifts

"Try switching if off and on at the same time."

'The computers are down, we're to use pianos until tech support repair them.'

Jack of all trades

The Computer Bore

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

Evolution.

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"It seems as if the people taking my software class are getting younger and younger."

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Early cyborg.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

The Not-So Smart Meter

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

Tossing computer into canyon.

"It's so cute when the boss brings his son to work and pretends to let him help out!"

"I do tech support for the cloud."

"And with the optional remote you make all these little lights go off and on really quickly." You can have an IT system with all the latest bells and whistles...or you could have one that WORKS

'You said the computer was coming between us. So I put your name as my password.'

Where was I?

Congratulations on your retirement!

"I have a new program that draws from his energy to power all our computers and phones. We should be good for the next 10 years."

If Disney was a software company

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?