Computer Studies Teacher Gifts

Computer Science - Prof Smiley, Visiting Lecturer on Emoticons.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

The Computer Bore

Campaign for Plain English

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

The DaVinci Code

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

'Here's MY information highway!'

Robotic Man

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

Four Types of Test-Takers...

Baby sees bottle with math formula marked, 'Baby Formula'.

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

Changing Minds

"He loves his computer but it's a love that's not returned."

Non-Denominational Carols

Evolution of man, starting at ameba through to computer

"Smaller, more powerful chips allow me to have a smaller head."

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

Geek fairies

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

Toy Shops and Educated Children

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.