Computer Comedy Lover Pillows

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

'How did you guess my password is wine?'

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

Terry had a computer bug.

Hardware and software

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

'Screen saver. . . or did his computer freeze again?'

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

"I didn't know they made a 'Sitbit'"

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

'It does data processing, word processing and list processing. Get me some data, some words and some lists.'

B2B.Com Pay Per View.

'By putting all our data into code, our competitors can't read it, our unathorized personnel can't read it, and I'm afraid, neither can we.'

"The are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't."

'...And in case of program crashes, this model comes fully equipped with an air bag!'

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

"Zoom says we have connectivity issues..."

Religion and technology.

STRIP Hambone: Using Tippex on a monitor

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'

'The number 1 dinner is available in an updated version 1.1.'

"This tone means the battery is low. This one means you've just driven over a pedestrian. And this one indicates that someone sitting near you in a coffee shop is about to grab your phone and stuff it down your throat!"

"We programmed it to behave exactly like a human... it never stops complaining."

I think that computer might be giving out a little too much heat... Energy efficient IT systems.

"Maybe it's just playing dead."

Instead of that CD, how about feeding me a nice bagel for a change?

"Before we go any further, I must warn you that this is not a secure network."

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

'Don't disturb your father when he's in stand-by mode.'

"No, it isn't a mobile. It's my pipe."

"Mine has a terrible battery life."

"You've got to compress it because my email account is limited to 3MB."

STRIP Hambone: 'Can't you programme this thing to laugh at my jokes?'