Compromising Pillows

'Sheila wanted a statue and I wanted a water feature so we compromised.'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

"Till death us do part? Don't be so bloody morbid!"

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

"'...Love, honor, cherish til death do us part'? Wait..."

'Jack wants to stay home and rad books, and I wanted him to take up roller skating, so we compromised.'

"Oh, no! That was the deal. Anchovey pizza, then we watch this!"

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

"Once again, nobody's happy A true whine-whine situation."

"No need to give me credit . . . I'll just take it."

'Let's meet halfway.'

"My therapist says you have to at least meet me half way."

Looks like I do dishes again.

'A sea view would be nice-Black Sea for him,Red Sea for me!'

'It's not the age difference, Larry - it's the wage difference.'

"When my Tia Maggie got married, she wanted 8 kids...and her husband wanted 2 kids."

'Right...we've agreed to mediation to decide whether or not we go to mediation!'

"Of course I mind, but it's the only way I get to see him"

"Can't they compromise and sell candy apples?"

Things one would rather have left unsaid - 'I will!'

"These oaths aren't binding all weekend are they?"

"I said to him eventually, I said marriage is something you're just going to have to do on your own."

Tunnel of Begrudging Compromise.

'Is it true a Maitre D' has the authority to marry people, just like the captain of a ship?'

'We're more or less engaged - he's just waiting for his fiancée to return the ring.'

"I don't even have a relationship with a bank."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, for what it's worth,'

'He's never gonna marry me now, Mum.'

"Do you have anything that declares my undying love, but with a six month get out clause if it doesn't work out!"

"Lets stop arguing about the pool. We'll divide it in half and stay on our half."