Competitive Strategy Gifts

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

Mergers Acquisitions

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

"This position has become very important to the company."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

A fight in the Boardroom.

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Manager. . . Commander. . . Chieftain. . . King!'

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

'And I'm happy to say, that since the merger...'

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'