Competitive Spirits Fan Gifts

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

'Gee, you beat Roger again!'

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

"Skate or die."

'He's been hiding out here for 20 years. Apparently, his buddies forgot to tell him the paintball tournament was over.'

Snail Racing

'Competition is good...unless it's too good.'

"Boss, the customers can hear you cackling maniacally." "I've topped myself, minion." "It's not enough to run ads that tout our own excellence: we have to simultaneously tear down the competition." "Behold: my masterpiece." "'100 percent of those who drink Coffee King’s coffee will die.'" "Best part is it’s technically true."

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'What makes you think we'll lose today?'

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

It was getting harder and harder to stay psyched.

'I'll never understand parents. They name you Patrick O'Kelly O'Grady and then punish you for shenanigans.'

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

"Look the competition has a big, stupid product. We need a big, stupid product of our own, and we need it now!"

Four fishermen catch the same fish.

'Glen Hoddle employs faith healer' "Remember the days we only had a magic sponge?"

"I'm here to gets the gold"

'The defence is ahead on points. Prosecution's only hope now is for a knockout.'

Motivational tip #731: Appeal to their sense of entitlement.

"Jim, just put that hole behind you."

'I hate snowboarders!'

'We're not looking for someone who wants to run with the wolves. We're looking for someone who wants to run over them.'

"I'm ready to play Hide and go Seek."

The weight of winning gold.

"Calm down, I'm just using the rules of modern competition."

"But seriously, medal of honor from the Academy of Sciences aside, who are you?"

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

"Whaddya mean line ball? The ball was out! O.U.T.! You blind or something?"

One-upmanship.

Players fight over a board-game called 'Squabble'.

WInter Fish

"I'm a Dinosaur, Hargraves, and I'm no herbivore."

'Our rivals have issued a big profit warning, so we'll issue an even bigger warning.'