Competitive Greeter Pillows

"I guess the fist bump as a greeting isn't quite confrontational enough these days."

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

'Gee, you beat Roger again!'

'Competition is good...unless it's too good.'

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

Danth battle?

The Cricketer and the Golfer

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

"Look the competition has a big, stupid product. We need a big, stupid product of our own, and we need it now!"

Four fishermen catch the same fish.

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

Motivational tip #731: Appeal to their sense of entitlement.

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

'We're not looking for someone who wants to run with the wolves. We're looking for someone who wants to run over them.'

A powerful tennis serve loosens the strings of a tennis racquet.

"But seriously, medal of honor from the Academy of Sciences aside, who are you?"

Two men jogging past one another trying to get as many words in as possible.

Skateboard Olympics.

Basketball Players Working Together

A Man mixing up his sports.

I know 'enjoy the day' is the latest trendy, trite pleasantry, but in this store, we stick with the classic, 'Have a nice day'.

Later accounts would call it the Greatest Water Battle of All Time,

'Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can pretend to beat up your dad!'

"Kemo sabe, I want you to be official greeter at my new casino."

"Better - but it was still too obvious when you went for the pine tar under your hat."

"I'm a Dinosaur, Hargraves, and I'm no herbivore."

Space Hopper Rodeo

"Tag, you're it!"

'Bank A' about to jump into to pool of competition followed by banks B and C

"Out? What are you, blind?"

'It breaks a father's heart when his son is less successful than him. Heh, heh.'

'You can't call it a fluke after forty-three wins.'

"What say we 'roshambo' for the last beer?"