Competition Calmers Gifts

Rower Bobby Pearce stops mid-race to let some ducks cross his path safely

Two Players both holding the same cue.

Fishing Boat Derby

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

Runner going through hurdles.

'I win!'

'This is our top negotiator's office.'

'Now close your eyes and visualize our upcoming softball game against the elm street zen center and kicking their sorry behinds.'

"Wow, fishing sure is fun. I can't believe I caught such a big fish my first time out."

The USA football team goes on the offensive.

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

They called her the Olympic Flame because she never went out.

'Jack's foursome gives out trophies at the end of the year...he came in fourth!'

"This new guy's really good!"

Obedience School Spelling Bee

What a stupid custom! I like it. Teddy. Twig. But I don't believe in Santa and neither do you. So don't hang your stocking! I do believe in mom and dad! Ahh

"Foul!"

"We just want a vacation --- we don't want to learn anything."

"It wasn't me jumping up and down and yelling in class. It was the sugar talking."

Don't laugh. It's added three points to his scores.

You are no longer in jeopardy.

'...and before we ask the $100,000 question, we've enclosed Carl in our sealed soundproof booth.'

"Ha!...I'd like to see the Jones' trying to beat our display this year!"

Scott finds Amundsen got to Pole first and cries

Too late they realized they'd awarded 1st place to a mop.

'Congratulations - you advance to the next round.'

'Before I throw can you tell me if my feet are behind the line?'

"So, when did you first have these overwhelming urges to spend �100s on therapy?"

Football face-off.

"Today, shocking news when it was revealed that the World Staring Champion has tested positive for Stare-Roids!"

The theraputic quality of the World Cup only comes to the fore with a good xenophobic thrashing of foreigners.

Mind Your Valuable Grey Matter

Phil's new yoga-golf technique was beginning to perturb the others.

'Remember, Robin, our sales competitors are the rich and we are the poor.'