Company Dynamics Buff Gifts

The Kavec Corp - A wholly owned (but nevertheless on good terms with) subsidiary of T4 industries.

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

"Your credentials are impressive, Carter but... quite frankly, Mr. Biggles doesn't seem to like you."

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

"If you're wondering why you've been chosen 'Employee of the week,' it's because your work load is about to increase, while your pay remains the same."

'All my venture capital is tied up in Miss Umpley, there.'

"I absolutely refuse to be surrounded by yes men, do I make myself perfectly clear?"

Yin and Yang VPs.

"Sorry, coffee is delivered by a union shop and you banned all things union."

The Department of People waiting for Something to Happen...

"Corporate thinks it's time we updated our motivational strategies."

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'

'There's a conglomerate of malcontents here to see you, sir.'

"You're nobody's fool but you're not too smart for you own good, either."

Miss Wilkins, I need you to pop in and hang up my phone for me again.

"The change management consultant wants to move the meeting."

'You'll be very happy here...I know I am!'

'We believe in having a very specialised team. Watkins here for example provides all our human error.'

'Some men are born great, some achieve greatness, and some are allowed to work for great men like me.'

Stan couldn't be bothered to stand up – yet hated being talked down to.

What do you tell someone who asks you what kind of work you do?

'One businessman's lunch and one lackey's lunch.'

"Bit if I'm here...how can I also be up close and personal to my managers?"

'Newgate, you'll be reporting to Cunningham, who'll be reporting directly to me. I, in one of those unexplainable paradoxes of the business world will be reporting to you,'

He had to control his tail or face the most bizarre sexual harassment suit in history.

'I think I've spotted our problem.' (too many consultants)

'Making a profit was a lot easier before so many countries abandoned socialism and started competing!'

'I love men in uniformity.'

'Remember to stay downwind from him, he can smell fear.'

'Well, at least we're ahead of our competitors in the number of CFOs we've had in the past year.'