Company Benefits Pillows

'The employees are angry because the company tennis courts are always busy!' 'LET THEM PLAY GOLF!'

"Staff support"

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

Labor Day '19

"You're entitled to ten sick days, five personal days and four complete do-overs."

'Yes we do have health benefits, but read the fine print. You're only allowed to get sick once every three years.'

"No, we don't have a pension plan. We don't expect our employees to ever retire."

After the latest pay bonus and benefit awards you've won, I've decided to join you on the shop floor.

'Desks equipped with airbags - for now that's our company's health plan.'

"You'll be allowed to work from home two days a week... Saturday and Sunday."

'Yes,I do have a question.. What kind of dental plan do you have?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

'Your employer's health plan automatically cancels your coverage once you get sick.'

I'll put my nose to the grindstone and shoulder to the wheel, which reminds me, how's the health plan?

'I can't give you a raise, Milhouse, because I'm going broke supplying you with health care.'

'Since you were previously self-employed, you shouldn't mind working for us without a health plan.'

The job carries 'salary but no health cover' or 'health cover but no salary.'

'You're offering me a job, eh? -- does it have portable benefits?'

"It's come to my attention that one of you hasn't taken advantage of the company's free gym membership."

'This new ruling on bankers pay has really thrown the cat among the pigeons...'

'With 13 holidays per year, 2 weeks sick leave, 2 coffee break each day, 4 weeks vacation a year, 80% of ife and health insurance, profit sharing, including various discounts and you still want a salary?'

"We could hire another accountant and secretary, but wouldn't it be fun to have a barista?"

"I couldn't get you a raise but I did get you a taller chair."

'I don't understand how the Americans are getting away with all these lateral hires.'

"Do your owners treat you well? Mine are very kind."

"We do have good health coverage, but then we never get od and we never get sick."

"Working here includes some pretty sweet perks."

Chester sat quietly as he enjoyed one of the perks that came with his job.

'We considered offering health insurance, but it's cheaper to have taxpayers pick up the tab at hospital emergency rooms.'

"Don't worry, I'll be very discreet with your personal medical information."

"And what made you apply for this job besides our free dental care?"

"Will I be covered by the same medical benefits plan?"