Communications Advisor T-Shirts

"As a concerned lawmaker, I take very seriously my responsibility to offer up banal and meaningless platitudes for social media consumption."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

'How fast can you hype?'

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Dialogue

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

Changing Minds

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

Ruddy bloggers!

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

Information...political rhetoric

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

"'Grim Reapers' was considered too offensive, these days we're known as 'afterlife facilitators.'"

'Everyone distrusts spin. . . so let's go back to old-fashioned lying.'

It's not a bad planet -- Their talk shows make it seem a lot worse than it is.

'Hi! I'm on the tree.'

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."