Communications Consultant T-Shirts

'Wait a sec...do you want that comment off the record or out of context?'

"Looks like he's coming around to our way of thinking."

'The Pope has decided to issue another apology for not issuing an apology.'

'If we are to reorientate our forward facing rhetorical platform we must rephrase our message to cross fertilise the core message..holistically!'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

Lynching on social media

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'How fast can you hype?'

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

This Message Has No Content

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Dialogue

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

Changing Minds

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

Ruddy bloggers!

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

Information...political rhetoric

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'