Communication Virtuoso T-Shirts

"My communication skills are excellent, thank you. Just because nobody in the office understands Ayapaneco."

'Please listen carefully - especially if you have a short attention span...'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"Who called this meeting again?"

"It's a play on words."

Ninedency: A budding tendency

"Your vocabulary is enlarged."

Thesaurus Company

"It probably got lost in the voice mail."

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

“Someone is not muted. I'm still hearing ambient noise. Please mute your device.”

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"Is there a way to disable Narcissus' self-view?"

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'Sometimes, from time to time, occasionally I wish I'd never bought that ruddy thesaurus!'

"Why do people think using big words is a bad thing?"

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

"5...4...3...2..."

'Aha! I think I figured out the headache problem, one of these things is pointed the other way. This would explain the double vision.'

Busking during a pandemic

"He's in a meeting, but you have 25 seconds to leave a video message."

"I'm away from my desk or on another line. Please leave a message at the sound of my impersonation of a beep."

"At work, we've switched to video calls for meetings, so my productivity has shot up exponentially. . ."

"It's my support group for Zoom fatigue syndrome."

Bookworm group

'I'm a voice over artist.'

Sign on Roget's Thesaurus, Inc.: 'Absent Ingesting Comestibles'

"Of course, that's only a first draft."

"I don't like the tone of your voice. Mind if I tweak it a bit?"

Bring It On!