Communication Seekers Gifts

"I don't understand... I've scientifically proven that you were wrong. How can you still be mad at me?"

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

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'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

"Hello? Speaking, not listening."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

She - Interpreter - He.

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

WiFi Signals

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

Letter Collecting Nerd

Ruddy bloggers!

'The usual ‘nod, nod, wink, wink' will do, Walter. We don't need the eyebrow twitch and nostril flares.'

"'Original' to 'Carbon-Paper': Do you copy?"

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

My wife's been talking to the skin I shed for over an hour.

'Let us pray...'

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

"Again, you may exercise your right to remain silent, but it's going to work against you since this is a job interview."

The Love Psychologists

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

"I know. I miss him, too."

They had a tendency to talk past one another.

'Before we get started, let's go around the table and practice making eye contact.'

'I was just ringing to see if you'd got the email about my letter.'