Communication Blooper Lover Pillows

'I'm sorry, did you say you wanted to try fresh sugarcane.'

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'

Bird Messaging

Bell invents the telephone.

"Instead of careful interpretation of the prose, maybe try pronouncing even the most basic words like an insane person?"

'I wrote on this piece of cardboard because the teleprompter is broken. Just say something about technical difficulties and we'll be right back after these messages or whatever. Just don't read this on air!'

"OK people, this one's for the blooper reel, so let's blow it out there."

"You're my agent, tell me - what do I have to do to be taken seriously as an animal-bloopers-show host?"

"It says 'Available Now: The Greatest Bloopers of Your Life, available on Pay-Per-View or DVD!'"

"I don't respond to threats. Or e-mails, by the way"

"They don't prevent crime, but the videos make great blooper reels."

Sorry I missed your call – I was on the other line.

Learn from your mistakes...this is the last time I let you talk me into a double date.

"Why, Susan, I—ha-ha-ha! Oh, God, sorry... Sorry."

"Why can't we have a discussion without it escalating into a shouting match?"

'Buns, rockcakes and paperweights.'

"This is a support group for phone victims. Frank butt dialed. Bib drunk dialed, Anne there talked bad about someone, but didn't realize she hadn't hung up..."

Hotline.

'Can't get through? Then e-mail them for pete's sake!'

"No, they're not mooning you, that's a peach emoji."

'I feel insulted whenever I receive a royalties check for the bloopers reruns.'

'There's a phone call for you, John!'

"Can you hang on a sec? I think I just took another picture of my ear."

'Thank you for calling, your pigeon is being held in a queue.'

Your Dinner Is In The Oven - Left as Eye Chart.

'In today's campaign bloopers, Obama called her 'Billary' and Hillary called him 'Oprah-Ama'.'

"No, no. It's three thumps for call waiting and five thumps for call forwarding."

'The extension you have reached is not a real extension....'

"We're letting you go, Hermanson. You're making all the sports blooper shows, but none of the highlight shows."

Rugby Pass and Shorts Come Off.

"I'm sorry, sir, but you have the wrong number. Yes, I'm sure this is the wrong number. Listen, Mister...have I ever lied to you before?"

'Is your TV on the blink too?'