Committee Jokester Gifts

Everyone's Invited

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

Laptop Dancing.

Virtual Doctor

"So, let's catch a wellness wave!"

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

'Take two and call me from the Emergency room.'

"Beat it! Here comes the major and his entire staff!"

'Could you stay out of the room for awhile, Nurse? -- Every time you walk in here, his testosterone levels surge.'

Cardiologist Henry Weil like to add some levity before surgery by hiding a whoopee cushion on the operating table.

'Don't worry about your heart - it will last you till the end of your days. . .!'

'Classical music, huh?...You mean like Elvis?'

'Brain surgery, Harold? Have you lost your mind?!'

"According to the latest research staff retention is more likely to be improved but improved conditions rather than chaining them to their desks."

Pharmaco. He writes drug side effect warnings. Ah, a health scare provider.

"Before someone says anything, yes, it was a long winter."

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

'Tax man practical joker sticks sign on colleague's back which reads; Tax me.'

'The popularity polls love what you've done with the budget deficit....moving the decimal one point to the left.'

'It wasn't easy, but I got you a jury of your peers — six hairdressers, five interior decorators, and a professor of 18th Century poetry.'

"Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing!"

'They're draft outlines on how to run a paperless office.'

Heart Rate, Respiration, Insurance Remaining.

"Next time you give CPR try not to use your tongue."

'Two scalpels and a nurses hat are missing...'

'So did you want the ectomy, or just the otomy?'

Why dogs are not hired to do bone scans

'Ed here has some sort of problem with his membership on the visitation committee, Reverend.'

Be careful how you unwrap it I think it MIGHT be his stool sample!

"I'm very highly strung!"

'You'd better stick with blurry eyes, anxiety attacks and hallucinations, because he drug prescription, I'd give,shows even greater side effects!'

Scottish Independence: The Union Jock.

Patient charts

"Hey Frank, how was your colonoscopy?" "In and out."