Committed Capitalist T-Shirts

"He can't speak to you at the moment - he's bonding with his compensation package."

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

First Church of the Almighty Dollar.

"I've deregulated Arthur, but he still doesn't run very efficiently."

Big business is not evil

World Economics

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'Ka-Ching'?"

"And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?"

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

"I, too, hate being a greedy bastard, but we have a responsibility to our shareholders."

The scales between gluttony and hunger

Fat happy businessman with a euro coin printed on his chest

"More important than money?! There's only one thing more important than money and that's more money!"

Large cap funds

"The only thing wrong with Capitalism is competition. Sign this non-compete agreement."

"You can take it with you down here - but no social conscience funds."

Shareholders Meeting - I don't like the look of this year's annual shindig.

'Of course, for me, Christmas has a deeply felt religious significance! The stock exchange is my church...!

Boom and Bust

Felson, Donne, Peters & Free Market Forces

Big Shot - Bigger Shot

Amputee watches wealthy man who has a spare set of legs.

"I can't say I love New York, but I can say New York loves me."

National Head Quarters - Mom & Pop Stores Incorporated

'They're not our 'profits,' Mike. We like to think of them as the organic by-products of non-toxic capitalism!'

"Then it's unanimous - we all reject the 'culture of free.'"

"Where'd you get that?"

"For the profits of which we are about to partake, we give thanks. Amen."

"Relax. We're market fundamentalists."

'As a young man, I wanted to do something more meaningful than just make money,but fortunately I outgrew that phase.'

"As regards the size of our annual bonus, let's bear in mind gentlemen, that we are hunters AND gatherers."

"You are truly a man who loves the free market in fair weather or foul."

Wordplay: Capitalist.

Following the Cash Crop