Committed Artist Gifts

Wife, five kids & thirst to support.

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

"I would like a tube of lemon yellow, cadmium red, cobalt blue, ivory, black, and zinc white, a sixteen-by-twenty canvas, a couple of brushes, and that book 'Painting in Oils'."

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

'I have a feeling one day when he grows up he'll be an artist of some kind.'

'I don't care if Jackson Pollock did start out this way. We are drawing kittens.'

Two grooms/wedding guests raise a glass.

'I really wanted to only take accounting courses, but my parents made me take this cartooning class so I would have something to fall back on.'

'Miss Donahue would give him an F.'

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

Children's Imagination

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'

Various Traps.

'Either you say 'I do' or you don't -- You can't plead nolo contendere.'

'And do you promise to be the one out of two marriages that does not end in divorce.'

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

Brian, I hope you're taking this seriously.

"I have been happily married... three times!"

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

"'Better or worse' and 'richer or poorer' are NOT choices."

Single girl in wedding dress trying to catch a bachelor.

"Are there any available upgrade options?"

"Running is great. Unless you compare it with not running."

"I see you do all your own stunts."

First Marriage

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

"I've made a fortune as a successful artist! I couldn't see this happening if I became a soldier or a worker..."

'In just six hours you will be simultaneously cured of your fear of snakes, heights, small spaces and commitment.'

What fear of commitment? Frank (heart) Lisa. W.T. Loves J.S. George + Gracie. O.H. Loves S.L. Lucy (heart) Ricky.

"That'll be the day!"

"You said it—everybody heard you."