Aspiring Artist Gifts

'Can you give me a blush in your cheeks to match this shade of crimson.'

'I don't care if Jackson Pollock did start out this way. We are drawing kittens.'

'Oh Rats! I can't be creative with a box of flat crayons!'

"Personally, I think minimalism in finger painting is a corruption of the medium."

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

"I knew the artist when he was just deluding himself."

So You Want to be a Cartoonist?

Brian, I hope you're taking this seriously.

'Okay, so it's not art, but I have to make a buck while I'm getting there!'

Painting for beginners

"I have a simple assignment. Draw what you want to be when you grow up!"

'I need to practice painting the human figure, MOM! Models cost money!"

"I am better than this. I should have been an artist's sketchbook!"

"I've made a fortune as a successful artist! I couldn't see this happening if I became a soldier or a worker..."

Children's Imagination

"The artist's early work is in the next room on the refrigerator."

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

Painter drawing bird of prey gets preyed on.

'I really wanted to only take accounting courses, but my parents made me take this cartooning class so I would have something to fall back on.'

Museum of Art School Portfolios

'Remember son, make sure you draw your cartoons well, have a good strong punchline and check your spellings ...the last thing you want is for people to laugh at your work!'

'Miss Donahue would give him an F.'

Stan the fledging cartoonist was happy with his new art table, but sad about his new ass lamp.

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

Al, why do they say that art is a cruel mistress? Well, let's see

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

"I've been an emerging artist for ten years now..."

Paint by number

Your Submissions

"I can't help but feel I'm destined for something greater than having a job."

"If you wish to see your artwork displayed, don't forget your bio."

"I would like a tube of lemon yellow, cadmium red, cobalt blue, ivory, black, and zinc white, a sixteen-by-twenty canvas, a couple of brushes, and that book 'Painting in Oils'."

"That'll be the day!"

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

What else is there to wish for?