Commitment Philosopher Gifts

'And do you,take Kevin to be your lawful wedded husband for three years or 50,000 miles?'

"Three. How many times you been married?"

Marriage Returns

"We have box shapes for every commitment level."

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

'We're looking for a minister who recognizes that relationships have a built in obsolesces.'

"Think man, think! We mate for life, are you ready for that kind of committment?"

"Please Dad, if he doesn't marry me, he'll end up making some other girl miserable."

"The Tudballs got married by a judge. I still say a jury should have been present!"

"Can't you just hold me – without holding me accountable?"

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

Unconditional Loveseat

"We don't have sex any more, we argue about money and you hate my mother. We should be married."

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

The Female Brain and The Other One

"Till death us do part? Don't be so bloody morbid!"

'No, but thanks for asking.'

A Reasonable Time for Concern

Frank and Ernie's Relationship Advice. It's not enough to just accept that relationships are two-way streets ... You must also avoid taking side trips down alleys!

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

'How worse? Give me the worst-case scenario.'

'Are you serious? I thought 'For Better or for Worse' was just a comic strip.'

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

"Yes, a surprise engagement. Even my husband-to-be here didn't know..."

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

"Will you still love me when I'm old and past it?"

Preachers with far too much input

'...Love, honor, and obey, no strings attached?'