Commitment-free Romance Pillows

I need a Valentine card that proclaims undying love but doesn't commit me to anything.

Right click for yes...

"I gotta be me!"

"Mr. Right!"

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

'After sex he checks his cell phone messages.'

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

"You may now kiss the bride."

Technology and Love

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

Spooning

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

Updated fairy tales - "Cinderella." Dating Service. It's not often we get a client looking for a specific shoe size.

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"I'd love to spend more time with you, Jason, but you're not on my fall schedule."

'Throw in your iPad and you've got a deal.'

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

"I was surprised myself, but living apart, seeing other people, and having virtually nothing to do with each other actually has made our marriage stronger."

'Darling, how romantic...a pre-nup.'

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

'Speed dating really works! Our first date was Friday, we married on Saturday, and now I'm happily single again.'

'I can't believe she married the prince after only one date.'

'One question, Vicar. Is it bad luck to invite any of the other people we're sleeping with?'

'Croak something romantic, will ya?'

'Tunnel of love, in a cold climate'

"....'Sickness, health? ... better, worse... richer, poorer?'... how about leaving me some wiggle room!"

'We don't text anymore.'

"I like what you've done with your apartment and your clothes."

"This locket contains my very first username and password."

Got suspicious after he asked to see a recent picture and she sent over an oil painting.

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

"I talked Vladi into skipping the transition to democracy in his country and just shooting straight over here with me."

Using a social media app to date